The Assemblagist

GLENN BECK, HOST:

You know, Vil­sack said that it is teach­able moment here. Hot root beer? Great! Hot root beer? Yes, go ahead.

What are you hid­ing behind the cam­era, Oscar? Like a hot root beer? Thank you very much.

It’s a teach­able moment. A year ago, we had a beer sum­mit. I’m an alco­holic, recov­er­ing. Yes. So, we will have a root beer sum­mit to see what we can learn from the mess with Sherrod.

Has it — has it hit any­body else that’s the way the Eng­lish say cha­rade? Sher­rod. Hmm. Just like the lady’s name in this. Sherrod.

*WOW, Glenn Beck is nuts. Really nuts… read the rest of this and see if you can dis­tin­guish my edits from real Beck­ian Buffoonery.

I told you before that this is about one of three things — noth­ing like boil­ing hot root beer directly from the streets of New York.

In an effort to dis­credit Fox News, and the media, they have made a huge mis­take. But I think that is option num­ber one.

Uh-​oh, did I at 5:00 yes­ter­day make that? It’s almost like some­one is play­ing three-​dimensional chess. Uh-​oh! Yes, the guy with the chalk and the chalk­board. And you got all these brains and all this money work­ing against poor lit­tle us at 5:00. How do you sleep at night? I sleep with my head on a dead moose and my hand up my own ass.

The other thing this thing is about is incom­pe­tence. I mean, how many ter­ri­ble deci­sions has this admin­is­tra­tion made? I mean really — ones that are destroy­ing the coun­try, it’s almost like they’re inten­tion­ally try­ing to destroy it? Oh, did I say that? I bet­ter take another swig of root beer.

Kids, don’t drink this stuff at home. I’m a pro­fes­sional. That’s why I’m able to spew such crap. No ama­teur could rant in this fash­ion, it takes a real girly-​man to stroke such lies.

The incom­pe­tence is not just in the White House. It is in the press. They are not incom­pe­tent. They’re com­plicit. Yes, I said it, I, Glenn Beck, am com­plicit. I repeat lies with­out any thought as to the con­se­quences of my action. And I find any­one whose skin color varies from mine to be not only ille­gal and infe­rior but also know that any­one out­side of Fox News is made of under­wear from Good­will. Entirely cre­ated out of the whole cloth that is used whitey tight­ies for righties.

Now, here’s what they say about me: Glenn Beck just does noth­ing but smear cam­paigns. Glenn Beck takes things out of con­text. Glenn Beck dis­torts things. Glenn Beck jumps to con­clu­sions. Glenn Beck is a fuck­ing moron. A bigot. A racist. A fool and a devel­op­men­tally dis­abled lunatic.

Really? Would you like the come over for a hot root beer sum­mit with us? Of course you would because you, like me, Glenn Beck, enjoy lick­ing park bench seats in Cen­tral Park and you, like me, Glenn Beck, have sex­ual inter­course with squir­rels and puppies.

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Fox news disclaimer:

This is a rush tran­script from “Glenn Beck,” July 21, 2010. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

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